It sucks. It hurts. I care about you so much more than I should, I wonder how you're doing everyday, if you've eaten, if you've slept...I'm thinking about you all the time and I don't know how to handle that. Especially because I doubt that I cross your mind, and if I didn't mail you a few days every week you would probably forget me in an instant.
I'm irrelevant to you. I know that, but I want to be by your side, even if it's just as a friend. Because I love you so fucking much, and the thought of truly never seeing you again makes my heart break.